I am sooooooo happy for myself. Went and bought some new jeans.. I HAVE DROPPED TO PANT SIZES IN TWO WEEKS!! Only two more to go and I will be in my old jeans again.. I am a 28! I am sooo happy. So so so happy..

And that is all I have to say :)

I larv this woman.

i just had an overly loving moment..
I read my Best friend's blog and realized how many times she mentions me in it, that makes me still feel like she loves me as much as she did fives years ago, and that makes me happier beyond words.

David is doing art!! ART! yes you heard me right.. he is such a talented artist, but hasn't started a new painting since we got Married.
I feel like my mom is doing worse then ever lately. It's hard to have a conversation with her lately without wanting to blow your brains out, and I mean that in the nicest way possible, I love my Mother.. but she is going comepletely insane due to lack of physical contact with the oposite sex, and lack of going anywhere but work. Right now she is cleaning out the drawers in the kitchen, looking at every single thing like it is the devil seeping out of the cupboards coming to eat her sanity, good thing she hasn't got sanity anymore... poor woman :(

That probably wasn't the best thing to post on my blog, but if I could change anything right now, it would be her. Litterally. I cannot stand the way she has been acting, but that saddest part is, I know she can't help it.

So, my BF has been experiementing with drugs, and this makes me SOOSOSOSOSOSOSO upset/bothered/saddened/pissed off. I liked it better when she was anti everything....


Im ordering chinese food online now, and am excited to get it.. I am lazy, and have nothing to eat in this house.. I need to go grocery shopping.... adios.

Tomorrow is Day One.

I am determined to lose at least 10 lbs, I would like to lose 15 but ill settle for ten. I know I am not "fat" I just used to be much skinnier, and since I am such a small person, I feel huge.. I weigh 128 as of today.... I just want to be fit again, I hate that all the meds I am taking slowed my metabolism down to a crawl it makes me cry, and I am sick of it, sick of not doing anything about it.. I want to fit in my size 2 jeans again..... Im a 4. I can do it! Please wish me luck.

I don't care, I love this song, it makes my cry every time I hear it.....





The lyrics are excellent as well.



What about sunrise
What about rain
What about all the things
That you said we were to gain...
What about killing fields
Is there a time
What about all the things
That you said was yours and mine...
Did you ever stop to notice
All the blood we've shed before
Did you ever stop to notice
This crying Earth its weeping shores?

What have we done to the world?
Look what we've done.
What about all the peace,
That you pledge your only son?
What about flowering fields?
Is there a time?
What about all the dreams,
That you said was yours and mine?

Did you ever stop to notice,
All the children dead from war?
Did you ever stop to notice,
This crying Earth its weeping shores?

I used to dream
I used to glance beyond the stars
Now I don't know where we are
Although I know we've drifted far

what about yesterday

What about the seas

The heavens are falling down

I can't even breathe

What about everything

I given you

What about nature's worth

It's our planet's womb

What about animals

We've turned kingdoms to dust

What about elephants

Have we lost their trust

What about crying whales

We're ravaging the seas

What about forest trails

Burnt despite our pleas

What about the holy land

Torn apart by creed

What about the common man

Can't we set him free

What about children dying

Can't you hear them cry

Where did we go wrong

Someone tell me why

What about baby boy

What about the days

What about all their joy

What about the man

What about the crying man

What about Abraham

What about death again

Do we give a damn?

I'm happy to announce the new piercings I am getting this weekend.. on the upper ears.... I love Lisa Edelstein.

I start school in January.... Going to study Theatre and Dance so I may one day become a Dancer/Actress... makes sense doesn't it?

Some lovelies below.. yes that is Milla Nude. Gorgeous isn't it?

I disappear sometimes. I get p's and s's confused. I wish I was not who I am. I enjoy spending time looking at pictures of women I think are pretty in hope's one day it will rub off on me. 

That's all. I've been gone, oh so gone.