I don't want to eat.

I feel so disgusting. I sat through class today just staring at my thighs. I think they are big, I think I am big. I go around the hallways comparing myself to others. What a terrible way to live. I should be happy I am healthy, have all of my limbs, and am not starving. I need this to change. I keep telling myself when my hair grows back, and all the dieting and excercise I have been doing kicks in, I will feel beautiful. But I should feel beautiful no matter what. I miss who I used to be. Will I ever get her back?